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as much as I’m not fond of twilight this isn’t a very good argument. the garlic association with vampires has always been pretty iffy. in some places they’re also repelled by lemons and apparently if you throw a handful of beans on the floor they’ll be forced to count them. at some point they were walking decrepit corpses that cant even PRETEND to be human. in some stories they steal life force rather than blood. Vampire myth changes a lot over the years and people can interpret and change them however they want. Vampires sparkling is not really whats wrong with twilight…

Agreeging with Aisha. 

This argument presented is all about targeting Stephenie Meyer’s creativity and how she didn’t ‘do vampires right.’ First off, it’s fiction and fiction can be whatever it wants to be. Second off, VAMPIRES AND FICTION, and people’s interpretations of them vary and that is perfectly acceptable. I know of plenty vampires novels where they are not repelled by garlic, or even dead for that matter. It’s up to the author to take an old myth and re’vamp’ it the way they choose. Arguments like these are close minded and imply everyone should just stick to the classical, and apparently ONLY way to interpret something. 

THIS THIS THIS

So many people jump on the vampire mythology ~inaccuracies~, when half of the fun of reading stuff based on mythology/myths is seeing how the author reworked it and added new things.

PLUS if you wanna get technical

Almost every recent zombie movie can be “debunked” and argued that it’s “ruining the reputation” of zombies and the threat of a zombie apocalypse.

1. “ZOMBIES AREN’T SUPPOSED TO RUN!” Zombies are dead too, just as dead as vampires. Zombies are basically decaying, decomposing human bodies, which would make it nearly impossible for them to run as fast as they do in the recent zombie movies.

2. Everything that exists could kill them. Flies can lay eggs in them, maggots hatch and eat the dead tissue. Every animal (dogs, wolves, bears, etc) would find them an easy meal, especially lions, tigers, rhinos, etc. 

3. Temperatures at any extreme would fuck them over. Dead flesh can’t survive in enviroments that are too hot or too cold. Living humans can because our bodies are constantly working to maintain homeostasis, but once we die we start decaying. Ever seen an episode of CSI where they find a dead body that’s been left out in the sun for days? Not a pretty picture. Heat speeds the growth of bacteria, and the gases in bacteria will make the zombies bloat, and eventually they’ll explode like a Boomer in Left 4 Dead. In dry heat, they would mummify from all the cell damage.

The cold would freeze them, like sticking a slab of uncooked steak or a pound of hamburger in your freezer. Since the human body is mostly water, they would freeze, since they’re not going to be protected against the cold like a frozen steak would be, wrapped in an airtight plastic bag.

4. The enviroment itself is filled with obstacles for zombies, like canyons, mountains, bridges, and rivers. Zombies are more apt to fall off of cliffs than repopulate. 

5. A zombie’s source of food and reproduction is also their top predator. That’s like us having to fight a lion or bear every time we wanted to eat or have sex. And humans have guns. And baseball bats, and crowbars, and cars, and military, and police with super-awesome weapons of their own. 

6. Zombies aren’t supposed to run because (iirc) The Night of the Living Dead used them as metaphors for death. Basically, no matter how fast you run, death will always catch up to you, even in its slow shamble. Kinda defeats the power of that message when the zombies can run just as fast as a Olympic sprinter. 

Disney movies are notorious for changing the mythology of their stories to suit their purposes. Hercules and The Little Mermaid, for example, are rife with “errors” and changes from their original stories. Grimm’s Fairy Tales have been revamped and retold with variations over and over again (Little Red Riding Hood, to name one). Everyone has a different interpretation of things, and that means variety and creativity, the pillars of fiction. What fun would it be if every zombie movie was the same? If every retelling of Hercules was the same?

But you never see people ragging on movies like 28 Days Later and shows like The Walking Dead for “ruining” the zombie mythos. Why? 1) I guess the horror genre isn’t as ripe for mocking as the ~teen/paranormal romance~ genre (which really makes me start considering hidden hints of misogyny), 2) myths evolve over time, and 3) it’s ENTERTAINMENT. We go to movies and books and TV to escape our crappy, boring reality. Sometimes we want to turn our brains off and just watch shit blow up, without being attached to “BUT X CAN’T DO Y.” 

If you’re going to argue against Twilight, “OMG IT RUINED VAMPIRES” is the weakest, most de-bunkable argument you can make. 

My argument against Twilight:

I wrote better fiction when I was 15. YGO fanfiction. 

And that is not a compliment to myself. :P